It feels like it was just yesterday that I packed my begs went to the hospital to evacuate or empty out the baby from me.
I was extremely nervous, laying on the operation table waiting for the doctors to show up and start cutting me up and take out my baby.
I was very excited too to finally be able to meet her face to face.
To hold her in my arms.
As the operation started, there were alot of discussion and etc among the doctors and the nurses. And suddenly, a nurse showed up and looked down at me and said ,
" Hi, I need to help the doctor to push the baby out for him from here (showing that she will be bending over my face (with her boobs in my face) and press the top of my belly to push out the baby)"
I was shocked that such a help was required, which I learned later from my friend that it is pretty common. Her baby was breech ed , so there were alot of "helping"/pushing given by the nurses to get the baby out.
However, I was lucky, as the nurse was just telling me that, she looked up and saw that my doctor had managed to take out the baby.
Baby is out. She said to me, "Doctor got the baby, no help is needed".
As I felt relieved to hear that, I hear another nurse yelling panicky,
" OH NO!! She (the baby) grab the pipes/cable(whatever wires hanging around)!! Fast fast release her grasp!"
=_=
Geezzzzz......
Baby is out.
Happy Daddy held her in his arms and said she is wonderful.
Emotional Mummy have tears of joy running down her face holding her in her arms.
Megan chaechae was excited to see her.
She is part of our family.
First she is this tiny new born.
Then a month passed, she is a fullmonth baby and she grew big and chubby.
Days and weeks and months just went by .
Before I know it, she is one year old today.
As reluctant I was for this day to arrived, but it did.
My baby is all big girl and one year old now.
Sigh~
The past year had actually been very hectic, busy and tiring to be taking care of of them both, Chloe and Megan.
Sleep deprived had become a norm for me.
My life revolves around my Chloe and Megan.
I spend more for them than myself.
It is just no longer me, but it is them.
She changed me.
She changed us and our lives in a way that I never knew is possible.
It is not about Chloe wanting me to carry her, it is about me wanting to carry/hold/hug her.
It is not about Chloe clinging to me every night, it is about me clinging to her every night. (I secretly do think that it would be me that could not sleep if I do not hug or carry her each and every night)
She is just this cute koala bear that I loved to hug and hold every night.
It would not be about Chloe missing me but it would be about me missing her when I do not see her.
And her scent?
Its something I could not live without sniffing her every single moment that I could.
It is my personal Chloé perfume.
Whether is her "nua nua" (saliva), her sweat (sourish stinky) smell, her powder smell, her hair, her breath, etc.....
I cannot help but breathing in her all the time.
I am addicted.
Any thoughts or images of her or at the mentioned of her, would just bring the smiles to our face and bring warmth our hearts.
I had even cried myself silly watching 2012 at the thought of the world ending and what would happen to my girls? I do not want them to be swept away by tsunami or any disasters.
I cried everytime some family got washed away or left behind to die.
I hate that movie.
It depresses me.
:P
Depressing movie aside.....
All of these are life's little rewards and gems.
Watching them grow.
Growing with them.
Watching how Chloe grows day by day.
The things she learned.
- calling Paa Paa
- calling Chae Chae
- saying BOOK...
- say "mumm mumm" for food
YET, no Maa Maa or Mummy....
sigh~ In fact I am even over the point of waiting and hoping.
Hahahah ... When the time has come and she will just call me when she is up for it.
The milestones she achieved.
- teething
( she had Just one upper tooth while she had two tooth at the bottom. So odd)
- turning
( she was very fast in learning how to turn over)
- sitting
( wobbly sitting and falling backwards and hitting her head on the babycot and etc )
- crawling
( she was reluctant to crawl. Always stay put and all. But after a very long wait (by a over-worried mummy monitoring her like a hawk), she overcomes her own limitations and from then onwards, there were no turning back. )
The struggle we had trying to fix her torticollis problem.
The frequent trips we had to make for her physio treatments.
Watching how the therapist wringged her neck left and right, twisting/bending her head, as if he is trying to pull my three months old baby small head off.
It does not help seeing how relatively small her head is comparing to his BIG palm.
It took her a good half a year to heal.
The small small skills or things that she do that surprises us that she observed and picked up fast.
- playing peekaboo
- playing tickling
- pulling/emptying out her ChaeChae's closet
- watching tv programs without blinking her eyes
(This is what I called the Khor family syndromes where all the people in the Khor family are 100% TRUE TV addicts)
- Pointing the remote control at the TV and trying to change the channels
- Pushing the stool from the kitchen to the living room and climb up on it to reach for stuffs.
- Stepping up onto the weight machine to see how much she weights. ( I think I had do it too often in front of her and Megan. Resulting in Megan weighing herself on and off too on the weighing machine. Next thing I know, the small copycat is doing the very same thing.
- Asking for a hug when her dad only hugged her ChaeChae. When her dad extended out his arms, she happily rest her head on his arm for the hug.
- Copycat my action of opening the doors with keys but taking the house keys and trying to open some imaginary locks
Things that I would say she is born with or she just loved doing...
- her love for her sister, giggling away at EVERY small stuff that her ChaeChae do.
- she loved to roll around on her ChaeChae bed with her ChaeChae every night.
- patting you on the back everytime you picked her up. It is like getting a pat on the back from her. Totally weird. But she does it all the time.
- dancing and moving to musics that she likes ( like her ChaeChae concert song).
- singing along to songs (other than children song. We caught her sitting quietly and singing along to Lenka's Trouble Is A Friend and even Nickelback's songs. In fact she enjoys listening to her ChaeChae's favourite Jai Ho (You're My Destiny) song from PCD
- defending herself in her baby talk LOUDER than her ChaeChae when her ChaeChae reporting to us on her wrong-doings.
- she loves dogs. Any dogs she sees, she gets all excited about it and even toy dogs cheers her up. She would just chuckled anytime you shoved a soft toy/toy dog at her.
- she loves chewing on her pillow corners or feeling the pointy edges.
- she loves eating bananas , apples , grapes, bread, rice, cookies, anything goes except for the moi that is cooked by me. Sigh~
- she enjoys water and a good bath .
- she is determine and persistent. ( She would screamed when you removed her from whatever stuff that she is not suppose to do. )
It took both me and her dad alot of strength , energy, patience , tolerances and etc to look after her.
But all the small adorable stuff that she does;
All the surprises she showed us;
All the laughs she made us do;
All the stuff that makes us shake our heads and throw up our hands and surrender to her;
Her smiles, giggles and laughter;
Her hugs;
Her loved for her big sister;
Her big sister's love and care for her;
Just melts away all the pain and aches ,leaving just the gratefulness, the love, and the glow in our hearts, and it makes EVERYTHING all worth while.
She made our family closer, happier, merrier.
AND our love and bonds had gotten stronger than ever.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, Chloe!
Mummy , Daddy and ChaeChae loves you.........
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